As the days pass by so quickly, as I look at Punk and Pea growing and growing, as I think about registering Pea for Kindergarten in the coming weeks, I feel increasing pressure to get "my baby" home NOW. I also feel strong temptation to change the game plan, explore other options--international adoption or foster to adopt or adopting through the state--options we've considered and considered again and opted against.

There are several reasons we've chosen domestic infant adoption, and those reasons still stand. First of all, we really want to have relationship with the first family. I miss that terribly for Pea and wonder when it will become an "issue" for her. We really want this new family member to have the opportunity to know and understand his roots. And, while we are confident that God will fill in the gaps in Pea's life, we also believe that being related to a birthmom through our second adoption will be a part of her healing. The other thing is that I just want to do the baby thing one more time. I loved, loved, loved experiencing the first year of Punk's life and I miss that we didn't have that with Pea. I miss it more than I thought I would. There are other issues with international adoption being expensive and difficult, but the fact that we would miss out on the beginning of our child's life and be unable to keep up with his first family are more weighty reasons.

So, I was thinking through all this again today, driving home from the grocery store, telling God how important it is that He brings this baby to us sooner than later. Reminding Him that the age gap is just getting wider by the day. Asking Him whether we should look at other options. That's when I remembered we'd been through the other options already. I felt Him gently say, "You wouldn't be satisfied." Yes, that's true. I wouldn't. "Are you willing to wait? If you do, I promise you will be more than satisfied." Oh, yes. How could I forget that about You! How could I forget that He is working it all together in just the right way. He has that birth family that will be part of the fulfillment of our family. He has that baby whose babyhood I will tenderly cherish. He's working out the scenario that will more than satisfy the desires of my heart. If I'll just be patient.